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  • Übersicht

    Sprachlabor

    kleines Handout über Nordirlandkonflikt- bitte um Korrektur

    Betrifft

    kleines Handout über Nordirlandkonflikt- bitte um Korrektur

    Kommentar
    Hey,
    ersteinmal hoffe ich, dass ich im richtigen Thread bin.
    Ich wollte einmal fragen, ob ihr hier noch Fehler in meinem Handout findet. Bin um Korrekturleser sehr dankbar!


    The troubles¹
    Beginning of the 19th century:
    -Irish parliament was dissolved -> North Ireland was a part of Great Britain - the Irishmen ( the most were catholic) wanted to establish Ireland as a independent state -> Britain emigrated some protestant British in Ireland and they domineered over the Irishmen-> a lot of problems
    Middle of the 19th century:
    -Ireland experienced a big economic crisis and a lot of famines. More than 2 million people died or left the land because the British changed fruitful farmland in grassland and exported meat and animals
    -Many British colonized in North-Ireland because of the high developed industry ->Ireland tried to become independent only the region Ulster in the north wanted to abide with Britain.
    20th of the in 20th century:
    -after the war of independence and after much hearings the republic Ireland was called, only the province Ulster remained with Britain. Following years: there were many tries to dissolve blockades. The reason for the conflict who is working/works in the last 30 years, trace break to the year 1969: 70 pacific catholic demonstrates marched from Belfast to Londonderry and was attacked by protestants and the police supported the attackers. The conflict escalated, many inculpable people died by assaults of the I.R.A(Irish Republican Army) and by the influence of the British police.
    The situation today
    1998: with the Good Friday Agreement they achieved a consensus for both sides.
    The ceasefire (“Waffenstillstand”) changed North-Ireland. Now it’s a save holiday destination, but the peace is very fragile and sometimes there are some excesses between the catholic nationalists and protestant unionists.
    Verfasserperu200927 Apr. 10, 21:13
    Kommentar
    Yep, you definitely have some problems there. I'll get the ball rolling:

    The Troubles¹
    Early 19th century:
    -Irish parliament was dissolved -> Northern Ireland was a part of the United Kingdom - the Irishmen (most of whom were Catholic) wanted to establish Ireland as an independent state -> Britain encouraged the emigration of some Protestant British citizens to Ireland/settled a number of Protestant Britons in Ireland and they ruled (?) over the Irishmen-> discord and unrest
    Mid-19th century:
    -Ireland experienced a huge economic crisis and a series of famines. More than two million people died or left the country because the British changed fruitful farmland into pasturage? and exported meat and animals [this point doesn't make sense - sounds like the English are feeding the Irish populace by exporting meat to them from England]
    -Many British citizens settled in Northern Ireland because of its highly developed industry -> Ireland tried to become independent; Ulster, in the north, was the only region that wanted to remain part of the United Kingdom.

    Someone else want to take on the next two parts?

    Peru2009, general comments: Surely you know it's Northern Ireland, not North-Ireland, and you do need to work on capitalization (Catholic, Protestant). Don't put the German term for ceasefire in the text unless your audience is German and you think they won't know what a ceasefire is.
    #1VerfasserKatydid (US)27 Apr. 10, 21:48
    Kommentar
    First, get those terms straight.
    GB (Great Britain) is the big island, basically what we get if we put the countries England Wales and Scotland together.
    UK (the United Kingdom) is GB + Northern Ireland

    @ changed fruitful farmland:
    I agree with Katydid, maybe you can make things clearer by saying that they "changed Irish fruitful farmland into..."
    And IMO there is some sort of a contradiction between point 2 and 3 of your handout... Maybe mentioning the government's attempts of making Northern Ireland economically more attractive might sort this out a bit...

    Further, if this is really your handout about the NI conflict then I think you should mention the Easter Rising during ww1 as it had an important effect on the way this conflict continued afterwards. But that's just a suggestion, I know this topic is vast.

    Anyway, I don't really know what you mean by "hearings". Maybe Verhandlungen? Then I would rather say "negotiations".
    I have the same problem with "republic Ireland was called"... do you mean "ausgerufen"? If so then I would use "proclaimed" instead of that. [...the Republic of Ireland was proclaimed...]
    You already mentioned in the last paragraph that it was only Ulster who decided against becoming independent for what it remained a part of the UK. If I were you I wouldn't write it twice.

    Is there anyone else who can continue?
    #2Verfasserasterix27 Apr. 10, 22:34
    Kommentar
    - After the war of independence and after many debates [?] the Republic of Ireland was founded. Only the province of Ulster remained a part of Great Britain.
    - In the following years, there were many attempts to break the blockades [?]. The reason for the conflict which has been going on for the past 30 years can be traced back to the year 1969: 70 peaceful Catholic demonstrators marched from Belfast to Londonderry. They were attacked by Protestants, and the police supported the attackers. The conflict escalated: many innocent people died through assaults of the I.R.A (Irish Republican Army) or were killed by the British police.

    The situation today

    1998: with the Good Friday Agreement a consensus between the two sides was reached

    The ceasefire (“Waffenstillstand”) changed Northern Ireland. Now it’s a save holiday destination, but the peace is very fragile and sometimes there are still violent altercations between the Catholic nationalists and the Protestant unionists.


    Hallo,
    ich bin kein englischer Muttersprachler, also keine Garantie.
    #3VerfasserKlara (DE)27 Apr. 10, 22:50
    Kommentar
    20th century:
    -after the war of independence and after great debate, the Republic of Ireland was founded, with Ulster the only territory remaining part of the United Kingdom. In the years that followed there were many attempts to dissolve blockades [what blockades? Introduce!]. The reason for the conflict who is working/works in the last 30 years (???), goes back to the year 1969, when 70 peaceful Catholic protesters marched from Belfast to Londonderry and were attacked by Protestants, with the support of the police. The conflict escalated, and many innocent people were killed, injured, or displaced in attacks by the I.R.A. (Irish Republican Army) or as a result of interventions by the British police.
    The situation today
    1998: the Good Friday Agreement established a consensus for both sides.
    The ceasefire (“Waffenstillstand”) changed Northern Ireland. Now it is a safe holiday destination, but the peace is very fragile and sometimes there are some incidents between Catholic nationalists and Protestant unionists.

    Not sure whether "unionists" should be capitalized here as well -- what do people read in UK media? At least in the U.S., you can also say "Good Friday accord."

    The part about its being a holiday destination (vacation, for me, but whatever) seems trivializing. Or are you selling the virtues of sightseeing in Northern Ireland? (Like, forget sectarian violence: the Giant's Causeway sure is cool.)

    Where's the Irish Free State in all of this, btw?
    #4VerfasserKatydid (US)27 Apr. 10, 23:02
    Kommentar
    @Katydid: Bei der inhaltlichen Kritik hängt auch viel davon ab, für wen/was dieses Referat gehalten wird. Ich nehme mal an für die Schule (Oberstufe? Mittelstufe? Welche Schulform?).

    #5VerfasserKlara27 Apr. 10, 23:09
    Kommentar
    Good point, Klara. I'll withhold further comment until the OP shows back up.
    #6VerfasserKatydid (US)27 Apr. 10, 23:17
    Kommentar
    Verschrecken wollte ich dich jetzt aber nicht...;-)
    #7VerfasserKlara27 Apr. 10, 23:19
     
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