Der deutsche Text ist doch schon schraeg genug,
zB "...nur den dritten Teil..." anyway

mir faellt nur auf dass im deutschen Text von Verkehrstoten gesprochen wird, waehren Du "accident victims" uebersetzt, was fuer mich lediglich Unfallopfer heisst

... might account for the fact that in Great Britain the number of people dying in traffic accidents is two thirds smaller than in Germany.

Thanks for the comment. I rearranged the sentence to express that the casualties are actually really dead.

I know that the German text is a bit dodgy and I refuse any responsibility :-) I didn't formulate it. It's for a translation class, where they usually give you incomprehensible sentences like that [sometimes it takes longer to work out what they want to say in German than to find the actual translation:-) ]. Another problem is, I never know how close one has to stick to the original text.

traffic fatalites
or traffic fatality figures
Beware of Rechtshaberei:
I wouldn't use cantankerous here (trotz Leo). The register is wrong, and I think the meaning too. "Contentiousness" would fix the register problem, but if I understand the German text correctly, you'd be better off restructuring the first part of the sentence:
A greater willingness to accomodate others on the part of drivers in Britain might well account for ...
or
A less dogmatic approach to right of way
or something like that.

I meant Rechthaberei, of course.